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"Please hear what I am not saying. Did you hear what I just said?" Many people think they get what someone is saying but this person wants you to hear what SHE is NOT saying. 
"Don't be fooled by me. Don't be fooled by the mask. For I wear a mask! In fact I wear many masks that I am afraid to take off. I give the impression that I am secure, that all is great with me, within as well as without. Pretending is 2nd nature to me. But don't be fooled. Confidence is my name, coolness is my game. I let you think I am in command. But please! Don't believe me.
"My surface may seem smooth. I try to make you feel everything with me is sunny and unruffled but my surface is my mask….. my ever varying ever changing mask. Beneath this coolness lies no smugness no complacence; beneath dwells the real me.
"I'm confused. I'm fearful and lonely. But I hide this. I don't want anybody to know it. I panic at the thought of my weakness being exposed. That is why I frantically create a mask to hide behind.
"I put on a nonchalant sophisticated facade to help me pretend---to shield me from the people who know. But these people are my only salvation and I know it. They are the only ones who can liberate me from myself; from the prison walls and barriers I have so painstakingly erected. These walls I am afraid to tear down.
"I don't tell you this; I am afraid to. I'm afraid you will think less of me; that you will laugh and you will see that deep down inside I am no good and you will reject me. So I wear a glittering empty parade of masks and my life becomes a front. I chatter with people in idyllic suave tones of surface talk and tell of everything that is really nothing; nothing that really is within me.
"So when I talk to you please listen to what I am not saying. I play games....my desperate pretending games. When I play these games please listen to what I am not saying."
WE HEAR YOU, BANANA! *HUGS* FastCounter by bCentral |
